- Miracle Mask. Marketer: Ontel. Pitch: "The amazingly comfortable sleep mask that eliminates light and blocks noise." Comments: As I've explained before, the ideal DRTV product has a potential market size of one per household. But how many households have sleep masks? On top of that, this is a classic 'better than' product. No wonder it's a 'fast fail'! (Link goes to spot.) Side note: For those keeping track at home, this is Ontels' fifth "Miracle" product after Miracle Foot Repair (2001), Miracle Socks (2011), Miracle Slippers (2011) and Miracle Copper Socks (2014). I'm not counting Miracle Hands because that one was a 'brand loan' to Telebrands. [ss]
- Bowl Brite. Marketer: Zoom TV. Pitch: "The night light for your toilet bowl." Comments: Add a few jets and some music, and this would be a big hit in Japan. Here, the target market appears to be nagging wives who hate when their man misses the bowl. Good luck getting him to give a sh-t, ladies. Side note: This spot has one of the oddest forced rhymes in DR history: "It's the light that cares because it knows that you're there." (?!) A loving, all-knowing toilet? I've heard of praying to the porcelain god, but this is ridiculous! [ss]
- Derma WOW. Pitch: "Make embarrassing dry, red, beat-up hands and cracked feet look and feel new again." Comments: Speaking of Ontel's Miracle Foot Repair, this product is reminiscent of that 2001 hit. It's a bit pricey for short form, but I really like the creative. On a related note -- and I almost never notice this -- I really like the music as well. It's catchy and upbeat, giving the spot a certain emotional urgency. Kudos to this producer for a great commercial and to the editor for an even better soundtrack choice! [ss]
- Drip Knots. Pitch: "Plush absorbent wrist bands with matching headband ... absorb the water and stop the mess." Comments: Good spot and solid testimonial work, but I think this solves a problem that is too low on the scale to motivate an impulse purchase. [ss]
- EZ Cuddle Pillow. Pitch: "The only contour pillow with easy access for perfect cuddling." Comments: Just when you thought every possible pillow had been tried ... Actually, this concept has been tried, but the positioning was a bit different. It was called Totally Tubular (see No. 6 in this Weekly Round-Up). On a side note: I'm not sure how I feel about the 'in bed' testimonials -- or that it feels like the entire spot is testimonials. [ss]
- Lidtastic. Starring: Susan Williams. Marketer: National Express. Pitch: Silicone lids "make cooking, heating and storage fast and easy." Comments: Every aspect of this pitch has been tried before, in some cases multiple times (see my Dueling Stretchy Lids post, for example). The lack of success to date doesn't bode well for this project. [ss]
- Quick Cover. Marketer: Will It Launch. Pitch: "The fast easy way to make your furniture look brand new again." Comments: Seeing as how one of the best producers in the business already took a crack at this (see EZ Covers) and it didn't roll out, I'm going to answer "no" to the question implied by the marketer's name. That said, I was 'on the fence' the first time I reviewed this concept, and sometimes timing can be everything. [ss]
- Slip N Zip. Pitch: "The amazing new pillowcase that zips around your pillowcase for a perfect fit." Comments: An apparent 'fast fail.' (Link goes to spot.) Also a classic solution in search of a problem. Never should have made it past the evaluation phase. [ss]
- The Smart Phone Clip. Pitch: "Attaches to your seatbelt for safer, hands-free talking." Comments: Smart phone accessories have had zero success to date and, I'll just come out and say it, this is a really lame idea for a product. [ss]
- Wonder Tie. Marketer: Hampton. Pitch: "The revolutionary, one-size-fits-all necktie that you never have to tie." Comments: A 'fast fail.' (Link goes to spot.) Curious that the one testimonial in the spot begins: "I never wear ties ..." With our aging population (more retirees than ever) and the rise in popularity of 'business casual' attire, I suspect that's most of America these days. [ss]
July 31, 2014
Weekly Round-Up
Posted by
Jordan Pine
at
10:14 PM
SciMark Report from July Response
My latest SciMark Report in print is now available on the Response Website.
The items I reviewed include: Tristar's Perfect Slicer [ss], Telebrands' Royal Posture [ss] and the iBall Tablet System [ss].
Coming Soon
In the upcoming August issue, I'll be covering the following new projects:
- Ontel's Dream Waves
- Top Dog's Fast Trim Roller
- And InveTel's Perfect Pop (already down, link goes to spot)
Check out this month's issue to see what I have to say about those projects.
Posted by
Jordan Pine
at
10:08 PM
July 23, 2014
Dan Borislow, RIP
Bloomberg reports that Dan Borislow, the man behind Magic Jack, died Monday of a heart attack. He was 52.
Dan leaves behind a wife and two children. Our condolences to the Borislow family.
-----
I met Dan when I was head of marketing at IdeaVillage. At the time, he was pitching this crazy new VOIP device and was interested in marketing it using DRTV. That day was interesting (to say the least), and I learned a few things about Dan. First, he was a proud maverick with 100% confidence that he would succeed at whatever he did. Looking at his track record -- even his amazing gambling record! -- it seems that his high opinion of himself was justified. As my dad used to say: "It ain't braggin' if you can do it."
Second, Dan expected other people to have as much confidence in him as he had in himself. The idea he was interested in our DRTV expertise died quickly that day. Dan gave a long talk about the telecom industry and explained how a loophole in telecommunications law would allow him to collect money from the big telecoms for every person who used his product. We listened intently, fascinated to learn from an expert in his field. Then came our turn. Our veteran CEO, Andy Khubani, and our team of experienced DR professionals explained our industry and concluded with several smart reasons why Dan's item was a long-form project and not a short-form project. Despite having zero DRTV experience, Dan disagreed and let us know he thought we were all idiots.
Later it became clear that Dan was more interested in Andy's money than his (or our) expertise -- and he was looking for a lot of it. A soon-to-be-infamous 'Dan quote' was born during the ensuing exchange. After recovering from the sticker shock of Dan's initial investment request, Andy sought some assurances that his money would be well spent. I'm paraphrasing the first part here because this is from memory, but Dan said something like: "All you should be doing is signing the check and saying, 'Go, motherf-er, go!' " Gotta love that kind of chutzpah!
In the end, Andy didn't invest -- and we all shook our heads over Dan's hubris. Personally, I was offended that he had so readily dismissed our advice. My ego didn't like being denied respect. Later, I got to have the first laugh when Dan's two-minute commercial for Magic Jack flopped. However, as we now know, Dan had the last laugh when the product kicked butt in long form and at retail and went on to became one of the biggest success stories of that time. It may not go down as "the best DRTV product ever," (another 'Dan quote' that underscores his confidence), but it will certainly end up in the top 10 in terms of revenue and legitimacy.
And that's my 'Dan Borislow story.' I've heard many others, and I'm sure many will be told as Dan's life is celebrated. He was truly one of those larger-than-life personalities and is sure to be remembered for decades to come. May he rest in peace.
Posted by
Jordan Pine
at
7:49 PM
July 17, 2014
The Sparkler
Description: A portable electric toothbrush
Main Pitch: "Combines a beautiful designer look with full-sized sonic power"
Main Offer: $10 for one with extra brush head
Bonus: Double the offer (just pay a separate fee)
Marketer: Telebrands
Producer: Blue Moon Studios
Website: www.SparklerToothbrush.com
Prediction: Unlikely to succeed
One-the-go toothbrushes are a trend in the oral-care category. Colgate's Wisp is a prime example. So it makes sense to try improving on the idea with an electric version. After all, many people prefer electric toothbrushes to manual ones at home, so why wouldn't they prefer electric to manual on the go?
But is this a DRTV idea? I think not. First, this product lacks the power and trust of a known oral-care brand like Colgate. Second, I suspect even Colgate couldn't generate enough direct sales of Wisp, or any other portable toothbrush concept, to sustain a DRTV campaign. Expanding a retail category with traditional advertising support is a different story. We face a higher bar in trying to motivate people off the couch.
Posted by
Jordan Pine
at
8:43 PM
Crumb Bug
Description: A mini brush vac
Main Pitch: "Picks up every crumb in seconds"
Main Offer: $10 for one
Bonus: 2nd one (just pay a separate fee)
Starring: Phil Parker
Marketer: Telebrands
Website: www.CrumbBug.com
Prediction: Unlikely to succeed
This product is similar to Pocket Vac, an Allstar 'fast fail' from January 2013 (see No. 9 in this Weekly Round-Up). I don't have much information on that product or pitch, but both items have the same inherent limitation in that they solve a narrow problem already being solved by the household Dustbuster.
Posted by
Jordan Pine
at
8:27 PM




