Review: Stuff Fit

Description: A bedroom organizer
Main Pitch: "Wraps around any size bed for extra storage space"
Main Offer: $14.99 for one
Bonus: 2nd one (just pay P&H) plus two Moon Bags
Producer: Hutton-Miller
Website: www.StuffFit.com
Prediction: Unlikely to succeed

This is similar to a product called Shoe Skirt that Allstar tested in 2008: It's just more narrowly focused toward kids. My concern is that Shoe Skirt didn't go very far, so I don't see how segmenting the market is going to yield better results.

It's true that focusing a rationale can be good in some cases, but this particular focus also creates a problem. Kids have zero interest in organizational items, yet we know it's critical to get kids excited about an item so they'll pester their parents to buy it. Selling items directly to parents for their kids -- with a few notable exceptions (e.g. Gyro Bowl) -- hasn't been a successful strategy.

The demographics of DR further compound the problem. Most of our buyers have grandkids this age. Picking up after them and getting them off to school isn't their problem.

Review: Sneaker Saver

Description: A sneaker cleaner
Main Pitch: "Guaranteed to extend the life and expensive look of your sneakers"
Main Offer: $10 for one bottle
Bonus: 2nd bottle, scrub brush & 2 deodorizers (just pay processing)
Marketer: Telebrands
Producer: Meltzer Media
Website: www.GetSneakerSaver.com
Prediction: N/A

I'm too late on this one, so I'm just posting for posterity. Similar items have been considered for DRTV before, so it's important to keep track of the ones that were tested.

Review: MicroMaid

Description: A microwave-cleaning gadget
Main Pitch: "Uses the power of steam to get your microwave sparkling clean"
Main Offer: $10 for one with two Micro Chamois
Bonus: Double the offer (just pay S&H)
Website: www.BuyMicroMaid.com
Prediction: Unlikely to succeed

This is sort of like a Mister Steamy (No. 15 on last year's True Top 50) for microwaves. However, the problem/solution is a lot less compelling. Between the various splatter guards and cleaning sprays available, I just don't think people view this as a problem in need of a new solution. The commercial does a good job trying to manufacture a rationale ("like a pressure washer for your microwave" is especially clever), but it ultimately fails to justify.

Review: Blankid Buddy

Description: A(nother) transforming plush toy
Main Pitch: "It's a blanket, a backpack and a pillow!"
Main Offer: $19.95 for one
Bonus: Water-repellent inner bag
Website: www.BlankidBuddy.com
Prediction: Bomb

No one will ever accuse the DRTV industry of originality, but this is getting ridiculous. Are there really still people out there who believe that because a plush toy that transforms into a pillow became a hot seller, a plush toy that transforms into other bedroom objects is a potential hit waiting to happen?

Give it up, people! Pillow Pets was an outlier and a craze. There is absolutely no indication that transforming plush toys are a new category capable of producing regular hits. Crazes just don't work that way.

Do you remember that Elmo doll that burst out in insane laughter when you tickeld him? Ever hear of any hot-selling, psychotic Sesame Street dolls after that? Right, because there were none (although I had a great idea for a Big Bird with Tourette's). Or how about those little gerbil things that scoot across the floor and make weird noises? Those are still hot, as evidenced by the fact I keep stepping on them in my house. But have you seen any other vermin -- perhaps a rat that squeals or a cockroach that hisses -- appear on store shelves in a stack-out? No? Well, there's a reason for that, too.

I give the first few people who attempted to ride the Pillow Pet coattails a pass. For all we knew, maybe Infomercials Inc. had discovered a rich mine of pent-up childish desire for Transformers you can hug. But the 50th attempt? It's time for someone to say it: Enough is enough.

Review: Toast-It-All Bags

Description: Toaster bags for sandwiches
Main Pitch: "A piping hot, restaurant-style sandwich in seconds"
Main Offer: $9.99 for four bags
Bonus: Double the order, recipe book (just pay S&H)
Website: www.ToastItAllBags.com
Prediction: Unlikely to succeed

This test gives me a chance to use one of my newer catch-phrases: "In DR, the third time is never the charm." I'm cheating a little here because I don't believe the second attempt made it to a DRTV test -- it was killed in the Web testing phase. But the first time they gave away a toaster and the item still didn't sell. That's telling you something.