The Slippery Slide

DR Master Joseph Sugarman once used the analogy of a "slippery slide" to describe how good advertising copy should flow. I always remember that analogy and try to apply it to every advertisement I work on. Below is his original description, an excerpt from his book, Advertising Secrets of the Written Word:

Picture a steep slide at a playground. Now picture somebody putting baby oil or grease along the entire length of the slide including the side rails. Picture yourself now climbing up the ladder, sitting at the top of the slide and then letting gravity force you down the slide.

As you start to slide down and build momentum, you try holding on to the sides to stop, but you can't stop. You continue to slide down the slide despite all your efforts to prevent your descent. This is the way your copy must flow.

Every element in an advertisement must cause that slippery slide effect. The headline must be so powerful and compelling that you must read the subheadline, and the subheadline must be so powerful that you are compelled to read the first sentence, and the first sentence must be so easy to read and so compelling that you must read the next sentence and so on, straight through the entire copy to the end.

This advice is just as valid when applied to a commercial, with the "problem opening" filling in for the headline and the product demonstrations representing the body copy and so on, each one so compelling you must continue watching all the way to the blue screen.

What's Up With DRTV Media

The biggest concern in the industry right now, the one topic that's on every client's mind, is what's happening with short-form DRTV media. In late 2008, everyone believed 2009 was going to be the biggest year in DRTV history -- and January indeed started with a bang. But then things started falling apart. These days, more than one industry leader has expressed concerns to me that we might be in for a long summer.

Whenever I have questions about the media environment, the first person I turn to is Dick Wechsler, president of Lockard & Wechsler Direct. If there were such thing as a PhD in DR media, Dick would be known as "Dr. Wechsler." As busy as he is running a successful agency, Dick was kind enough to write the guest post below, which explains what's happening and what we can expect. Dick writes:

Few factors affect the health of the DRTV business more than available and affordable television inventory. With the world mired in a deep recession, one would expect television inventory to be widely available at fire sale rates. That isn’t the case. In fact, the market for DRTV inventory, particularly two-minute avails, is extremely tight.

Putting emotional frustrations aside, there are real factors shaping the current media environment. There’s a good chance we’ll be contending with these factors for some time to come.

1. There is a real reduction in the number of commercial minutes available. There were 15% fewer commercial minutes in January 2009 than in January 2008. There were 10% fewer commercial minutes in February 2009 than in February 2008. This contraction places significant pressure on inventory that would normally be available to DRTV advertisers.

2. The 2009 Cable Upfront Market, which follows a calendar year, was the strongest in history. Upfront contracts are inflexible in the first quarter of the deals. The strength of the Cable Upfront explains why 1Q was surprisingly tight for DRTV despite the economic downturn.  In fact, the progressive growth of the Cable Upfront market over the past three to five years is largely responsible for the tightening of the 1Q DRTV market over that same period.

3. Poor economic conditions did prompt many Upfront advertisers to release inventory back into the market as is permitted under their contracts. However, much of this inventory never found its way to the DRTV scatter market. Why? Because the advertisers who released it were allowed by the cable networks to purchase it back at lower rates than they had negotiated in the Upfronts. These buys are taking place week to week, creating a very volatile market.

4. Going forward, we expect the Upfront Market to weaken and the Scatter Market to strengthen creating even greater inventory and pricing volatility.

5. DRTV is a leading indicator of the economy. Inventory began to open up in 2Q 2008 and response rates were strong. The economy began to unravel in 3Q. We’ve experienced a progressive tightening of inventory since January of this year and a corresponding weakening of response rates.

So, going forward, expect the DRTV media market to be choppy. Despite growing unemployment and a weak economy, very real factors have affected the television marketplace and the opportunities one would expect to be available to DRTV advertisers.

Review: Mighty Blast

Description: Foaming carpet cleaner
Main Pitch: "Lets you blast away stains from up to six feet away"
Main Offer: $19.99 for one 15-oz can
Bonus: Triple the offer plus a Micro Fiber Duster (just pay P&H)
Starring: Taylor Baldwin
Marketer: Plymouth Direct
Producer: Hutton-Miller (formerly Miller Direct)
Website: www.MightyBlast.com

Product (D7) Score: 5 out of 7
Commercial Rating: Good

Note: This post has been updated to include missing information and correct unintentional inaccuracies.

This is the fourth product to air on DRTV under the "Mighty" name after Mighty Putty, Mighty Mendit and Mighty Shine. Interestingly, it has the same weaknesses as the other Mighty products. First, it's not unique in the sense of being totally different from what's already on the market. Like epoxy and liquid bonding agents, foaming carpet stain removers already sell in stores. Second, it pushes the credibility envelope once again. Because of their experiences with similar products, people will have trouble believing that this product will instantly remove stains from "six feet away." It's really a Catch 22. When a product isn't unique, it needs to be different and better by a lot. But in trying to stand out and achieve that standard, it often ends up straining credibility.

Then again, this dilemma didn't seem to slow down Mighty Putty or Mighty Mendit very much. I think a big reason was the combined creative genius of the Plymouth marketing team, Hutton-Miller and Billy Mays. Together, they came up with a killer pitch and those great "wow" demos -- stunts, really -- that few will soon forget (pulling a tractor trailer with Mighty Putty, repairing a torn parachute with Mighty Mendit). This commercial does not feature Billy Mays and departs from the style of the commercials that featured him. While the spot does have some well-conceived demos, the impact of those demos is blunted by the fact that B-roll is favored over having the spokesperson perform the demos right before your eyes. When credibility is a potential issue, such "live" demos are critical.

That's not to say the commercial isn't well done otherwise, and the offer is as big and compelling as I've come to expect from this marketing team. In fact, my biggest concern isn't about the product or commercial at all: It's about the name. As I've mentioned before, brand extensions seem to have a higher-than-average failure rate, even when the product itself meets all the criteria for success. I feel so strongly about this that I often refer to it as the "curse of the brand extension" and advise my clients to avoid saddling their products with the burden of a successful name (irony intended).

The huge success of Mighty Mendit caused me to think twice about this, but so far it seems to be an exception to an otherwise sound rule (Mighty Shine does not appear to be joining it). The evidence on the other side (One Touch, Vidalia, Debbie Meyer) is compelling. But who knows? Maybe this product will help break the curse once and for all.

Thoughts on "Pitchmen," Episode Four

I'm a little bit late with this post because I caught the episode in pieces, and I wanted to wait until I'd seen the whole thing. Once again, I found the show to be interesting and entertaining, but I'll focus on the marketing since that's my area of expertise.

I don't have much to say about What Odor that I didn't already say in my previous review. In that review, I talked about "the difficulty of proving odor elimination on TV," which Billy and Sully also identified right away when presented with the item. They ultimately went with that "green fog" animation I see often in spots (and don't like) and that entertaining skunk demo, which I thought was inspired but didn't play well in the actual spot.

What I found most interesting, however, was the idea Billy came up with for focus testing the product: deodorizing an entire hockey team's sweaty gear. What a great idea. That segment of the show also captured the natural reactions of the players -- amazement and praise for the product. Edited for the spot, it would have nailed two of the Tried & True DRTV Techniques at once: featuring a "magic" demo and establishing credibility with testimonials.

As for the other products featured on the show, I don't have much to add. I loved the Aussie Vertical Grill as much as the guys did, and it was sad to see it get back-burnered because of cost. Unfortunately, that's what happens sometimes. There's a price barrier for both short-form and long-form DRTV, and marketers violate it at their own peril. To paraphrase Al Ries again: You can live by the rules and miss an opportunity on occasion, or you can live a life of chaos (and poverty).

Not much to say about the Genius Frying Dome, either. I don't have experience with long-form cooking products.

Review: Neckline Slimmer

Description: Small exercise device that tightens neck and face muscles for a slimmer neckline
Main Pitch: "Firm, lift and smooth your neckline ... in just two minutes a day"
Main Offer: $19.99 for one unit with three resistance springs
Bonuses: Carrying bag, training DVD and Firming Accelerator cream (just pay P&H)
Starring: Michelle Edmonds
Marketer: SAS Group
Producer: Hutton-Miller (formerly Miller Direct)
Website: www.BuyNecklineSlimmer.com
Product (D7) Score: 7 out of 7!
Commercial Rating: Good/Excellent

This item is weird to watch in action -- but then you get over it and start to realize that it's a truly brilliant idea, especially from a DRTV perspective. Not only does it meet all seven criteria for a good DRTV item, it nails the "unique" and "problem solver" criteria like few items do.

One line from the commercial perfectly encapsulates the genius of this idea:

"It does for your neckline what exercise does for your body."

Why didn't someone think of that before?! For all these years, people have been suffering from the "turkey neck" problem (as a famous FedEx commercial put it) and thinking there was no solution to their problem (except, of course, losing a lot of weight). Then some brilliant individual thought of taking the same approach DRTV marketers have been taking to abs, thighs and buns for decades and applying it to the neckline.

Does it work? Is it possible to "use progressive resistance to tighten the underlying muscles of the neck," as physiotherapist Paul Younane claims in the spot? Who knows? But at $19.99, a lot of people will buy this to find out.

As for the commercial, it's very well done. The commercial is beautifully shot, the before-and-after photos are compelling and the offer is well thought out and strong. The only thing missing is a solid guarantee. Guarantees have fallen out of vogue for some reason, and in many cases they aren't necessary. But I think beauty products should always have a guarantee because women have tried so many new products with big promises that have disappointed them. Besides, the Firming Accelerator cream is a stand-alone item that's perfect for a "keep the bonus" guarantee.

On a side note, I almost faulted this spot for taking too long to get to the product. It's front-loaded with promises and end results. Then I realized the reason for the delay: That weirdness problem I mentioned earlier. Waiting was the right move. Better to get people hooked on the promise before seeing that odd-at-first product demonstration.