Description: A cosmetic click-pen that dispenses an aloe-based concealer and facial highlighter
Main Pitch: "Your skin will glow like never before" because it's "scientifically formulated with hydroponic aloe"
Main Offer: $20 for one
Bonus: Rose Shade Highlighter for an additional $10 and no additional shipping
Product (D7) Score: 4 out of 7
Commercial Rating: OK
It's rare for me to reach this conclusion, but the biggest problem with this campaign may be the commercial and not the product. Although the product does face several challenges in the marketplace, there may be a way to make it sell. But this commercial is not that way.
First, the product. My main concerns are its uniqueness (is it different enough to stand out in a cluttered category dominated by big brands?) and the price ($20 seems awfully expensive for a single makeup pen, especially in this economy).
I also think the product may be inherently difficult to explain. To begin with, it's a click pen, and that requires attention. It's made from "hydroponic aloe," two words that also demand explanation. (Why is aloe beneficial in this context? What does "hydroponic" mean, and why is that method of growing plants better?) And it's positioned as both a concealer and a facial highlighter. That's a lot of stuff to fit into 1:30.
Some of these issues may be rooted in the advertising strategy, not the product itself. Just because an item can do 57 things doesn't mean you need to promote all 57 ... which leads me to the commercial. The only thing I love about it is the production value. It's beautifully shot and well edited. Otherwise, I think it needs work.
Specifically, while it utilizes quite a few of the proven DRTV selling techniques, it also misses quite a few. For example, the commercial doesn't start with a problem. Instead, it tries the "new breakthrough" approach, which really only works if: a) you're an established brand and/or b) your innovation is truly earth-shattering. Neither is the case here. I also didn't like the non-traditional presentation of the bonus. When it comes to bonuses, free is best. Free just pay separate shipping and handling is also fine. But $10 with no additional shipping doesn't make sense. The bonus becomes a forced additional sale rather than an extra benefit of ordering.
But the biggest problem with this commercial is that it tries to fit 10 pounds of messaging into a five-pound bag. The marketers in charge of this one need to cut copy relentlessly until they get to the core of the product -- a simple, clear set of selling points. The calls generated by this creative are bound to be long and full of questions, resulting in a low order conversion rate.