Rounding Out the Year

1. Mighty Ratchet. Starring: Beau Rials. Marketer: TV Goods. Pitch: "Nothing’s ever too tight or too hard to tighten because you can use both hands." Comments: I like tools, and I especially like Beau Rials pitching tools. He does an excellent job here again. Unfortunately, though, the tool category hasn’t been a reliable source of winners for some time. Even the few hits have struggled to maximize their sales potential at retail. [ss]
 
2. dualBeats. Marketer: InvenTel. Pitch: "High fidelity headphones with a dual purpose." Comments: This is 'following' taken too far. It won't be the following of IdeaVillage's Flips Audio that will be the biggest problem. It will be the following of a mega-brand's trademark too closely. As I've written, predicting the future isn't always difficult. [ss]
 
3. Lil Lamps LED. Starring: Anthony Sullivan. Pitch: "The little lamp that lights up a big space." Comments: This is a mini version of an Old Gold item that was rolled out twice by Telebrands, the first time as Stick-Up Bulb (2006-2007) and the second time as InstaBulb (2012-2013). For those keeping score at home, that could be considered a five-year repeat. Even if that's confirmed, this product (while cool and different) is being tried too soon. [ss]
 
4. NanoGlide Pro. Marketer: Will It Launch. Pitch: "Increase your car or truck's fuel economy and oil life." Comments: Besides liability concerns, an "average 7% increase in MPG" just doesn't sound compelling to me. In general, that has been the challenge with these projects: The savings aren't exciting enough. [ss]
 
5. Frost Off. Marketer: Telebrands. Pitch: "The easiest way to remove frost, ice -- even snow -- instantly." Comments: Telebrands' version of Tristar's Frost Gone. [ss]
 
6. Tasty Roaster. Marketer: Hampton Direct. Pitch: "Cooks delicious meals in a microwave minute." Comments: This appears to be the same product as Allstar's Rapid Roaster (No. 5 in this Weekly Round-Up), which was tested just last month and disappeared quickly. [ss]
 
7. Toilet Spear. Starring: Joe Fowler. Pitch: "New toilet tool ... makes cleaning better and easier." Comments: Toilet tools have a terrible track record on DRTV, most likely because of my "s**t solutions don't sell" hypothesis. Watching this commercial, you can see how the gross factor kills the sale. (Poor Joe!) [ss]
 
8. V Broom. Starring: Anthony Sullivan. Marketer: Telebrands. Pitch: "V-shaped rubber bristles ... form an impenetrable wall." Comments: Floor care is not my favorite category. I can't think of a single success since 2004-2005 when Sully and Telebrands brought back One Sweep, no doubt the inspiration for this product and commercial. [ss]
 
9. Wonder Forts. Pitch: "Build amazing forts and play spaces." Comments: There's definite play value here, but my inner child doesn't find it to be very cool/exciting. Part of the fun of building a furniture fort was using everyday materials. This is too much like work. [ss]
 
10. Wonder Pot. Marketer: Tempo 3000. Producer: 3rd House. Pitch: "Never burn food or boil-over again." Comments: Neat product, but I have trouble envisioning the customer. If a guy buys it for his woman, he may as well buy a Magic Bloom bouquet, too, and get used to sleeping alone. If a woman buys it, she has put herself in the 'Bad Cook Club' (HT: J.S.) -- even thought the creative does its best to make excuses for her. [ss]

ThighMaster Vibrato

Description: A vibrating ThighMaster
Main Pitch: "Just put it between your knees and squeeze for sexy hips and thighs"
Main Offer: $19.99 for one
Bonus: Bronzing gel (just pay separate P&H)
Starring: Suzanne Somers
Marketer: Product Trend
Watch it on iSpot.tv

I suspected Ms. Somers had a flare for the sexual innuendo when I first saw her Three-Way Poncho commercial. It was her delivery of the line, "three-way poncho, that is," after the VO repeatedly encouraged viewers to "get a three way." This commercial confirmed my suspicions. But in this case, the innuendo is unavoidable given the product goes between a woman's knees ... and vibrates.

Of course, the ThighMaster was always sexually suggestive. Many would argue this is the main reason it became such a mega-hit back in the day, and the success of Neckline Slimmer in 2009 and Shake Weight in 2010 (for similar reasons) supports that hypothesis.

S7 Analysis: Even when delivering sexually suggestive lines, Ms. Somers always comes across as classy and credible. That makes her commercials highly engaging, which is a subtle aspect of pitch work that doesn't get much attention but probably should. As for the product, it's the ultimate in Old Gold, so it clearly meets all of the criteria. The marketers have even found a way to one-up the original while keeping the product focused on a single area of the body -- another secret to the original product's success that was missed in a previous attempt to bring this concept back (see Flex Shaper).

Hamper Hoops

Description: A basketball hoop for laundry
Main Pitch: "The all-star basketball hoop and hamper"
Main Offer: $19.99 for one
Bonus: Ball (free)
Brand: Wham-O
Marketer: IdeaVillage
Watch it on iSpot.tv

Every guy has played hamper or trash-can 'basketball' in his life, so this idea is tapping into an existing behavior. Other than that, this concept strikes me as iffy at best. For kids, there are several cool basketball toys already on the market that aren't trying to trick them into cleaning up their room. For parents, the idea that kids will suddenly have spotless rooms because of this product will sound too good to be true.

My thought as a parent: Let's not give kids an extra reason they don't need to toss dirty laundry around!

S7 Analysis: Not applicable. Someday, perhaps, I will create a set of criteria for kid products.

Crispy Wave

Description: Microwave crisping sheets
Main Pitch: "The unique new way to brown your food in the microwave"
Main Offer: $10 for a roll
Bonus: 10 Pop-a-Rounds (just pay a separate fee)
Starring: Cathy Mitchell
Marketer: Telebrands
Watch the spot

This project may be inspired by an Old Gold item from the 1990s. The item is so old, it predates all of my archives. I believe it (or at least one version of it) was called Brown 'N Crisp, and it appears to have been a foil-lined pocket.

Whether Old Gold or not, there is a lot to like about this project. First, it stars Cathy Mitchell, who is on a roll of late. Second, it features great-looking food coming out of the microwave, which is something that Telebrands had success with last year (see Stone Wave, a 2013 True Top Spender). Third, the pitch is about making life easier, which is a tried-and-true way to get DRTV buyers to 'call now.'

Those are the positives. There are also a few negatives, of course. For instance, the idea of doing 'crispy' in the microwave has been tried a few times without success. Lenfest tried it with Perfect Micro Crisper in 2011, and Allstar tried it with TastiWave the year prior. Another issue is the low-perceived value of something that looks like a roll of wax paper, not to mention that the roll is going to run out and require repurchase. Such products always have more appeal to the marketer than the consumer in the phase where the product is "not available in stores."

S7 Analysis: This project meets all of the S7 criteria except perhaps one: It may not be needed, which is why it hasn't fared well in the past. Crisping the slow way -- in a toaster oven or regular oven -- may be 'good enough' for most people.

MicroTouch Tough Blade

Description: A three-blade razor
Main Pitch: "Get a perfect shave for an entire year for under $20"
Main Offer: $19.99 for the razor
Bonus: MicroTouch trimmer, 12 replacement blades (free)
Starring: Brett Favre
Marketer: IdeaVillage
Producer: Blue Moon Studios
Watch it on iSpot.tv

Big brands Gillette and Schick have created a problem with their battle to have the most blades: They have stopped providing sufficient value to justify their prices. How else to explain the success of MicroTouch One, the predecessor to this project? If five blades mattered, one blade shouldn't have stood a chance.

Now IdeaVillage is getting into the multi-blade game. With Brett Favre and their 'year's worth of shaving' value proposition, they look credible and preferable to the competition. But how big of a bite can they take out of that business before the big boys notice and strike back? That's what I'm curious to know.

S7 Analysis: IdeaVillage is clearly in defiance of the guideline that DRTV companies should focus on uncrowded categories not already "dominated by big brands with big ad budgets and a few decades of consumer loyalty." But as noted above, this is a guideline they have successfully defied in the past.